


flickering like the street lights above us

by queerfawn



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Compilation, Implied Suicide Attempt, Is that a thing, Light Porn, M/M, Other, Prompt Fill, This is just further proof I literally only right Lams honestly, Vampires, i honestly do not care, one shots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2017-01-11
Packaged: 2018-08-18 20:03:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8174269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queerfawn/pseuds/queerfawn
Summary: A collection of short pieces I don't like enough to publish on their own





	1. Chapter 1

In four counts. Hold four counts. Out four counts. Hold four counts.

Alexander struggled to regulate his breathing and prevent an attack as he stood outside the door to Laurens apartment. He knew this was stupid and he shouldn't be here. He knew Laurens would laugh in his face and tell him to go home. This was ridiculous and-

"Hamilton?" He was pulled from his revelry by the door being pulled open and the subject of his thoughts standing shirtless before him.

"Laurens, hi," Said Alex, blushing slightly as he ruffled the hair at the back of his neck. "Um, can I come in? I want to talk- if that's okay."

Laurens nodded. "Yeah, yeah, of course. Sorry about being shirtless, I just got out of the shower." A beat. "Though I guess with the nature of our relationship you don't mind."

Alexander chewed anxiously on his lip as he stepped into the apartment. "That's actually not why I'm here. If you'd prefer me to leave, I understand."

He knew what the likely response would be. They had sex, that was it. They didn't really know each other. Alex used it to cope, and Laurens used it to self destruct. Perhaps they both did.

"No, stay, it's okay," Laurens said surprisingly quick. "Sit," He added, gesturing to the couch.

Alex accepted the offer, tucking his feet under him and running his hands up and down his thighs. "I'm really sorry, I shouldn't've come tonight. I just- it's a bad, bad day. And- god this is so fucking stupid- I trust you. You're all I've wanted today. I want to hold your hand and sleep next to you, and that's all I want to do," He was desperate now, eyes wide and terrified. "I understand if you don't want me here just please tell me now before I say something even more stupid."

Laurens was giving him an odd, guarded look that made his stomach turn. He hated how easily the other man hid what he was feeling while Alexander himself was an open book. After a moment of silence Laurens beckoned him to his side of the couch, not speaking until Alexander was half laying on him and tangled in the freckled boys limbs.

"You're not going to say anything stupid, you think too much for that," Laurens spoke into his hair and earned a small laugh. "And quite honestly, Hamilton, that sounds fucking great right now. So, you know, chill out for two seconds and indulge yourself."

Alexander managed to 'chill' for about a minute, trying to push down the other things he wanted to say and failing despite his best efforts. "Actually I uh- there's more, if you don't mind," He said tentatively.

Laurens nodded, fingers starting to trace lazy patterns over Alexander's arms. "Fire away."

Alexander took a shaky breath, squeezing his eyes shut. "I like you a lot. Like- this even sounds stupid in my head I'm sorry- I have a crush on you. I don't just want to have sex, yeah the sex is great but... I want more. Again you can kick me-"

"Alexander," Laurens' voice was sharp, though not angry. It made him stop simply because it was the first time the other man had ever said his name. His heart was racing before he could even continue. "You talk too damn much, Christ. If you would've paused for feed back you would know that I 'have a crush' on you too, dumbass."

"Boyfriends?" Alexander asked tentatively, twisting around to look at him.

"Boyfriends," Laurens agreed.

Alexander kissed him then, slow and breathtaking. The other man pulled away to cover his face in quick kisses, earning a giggle. Then Laurens was kissing the spot on his neck he new would drive him wild and he whined high in his throat. "John," He said softly, voice already breathy.

"Yes?" John asked, pulling away and quirking an eyebrow.

Alexander shot him a grin. "I was just seeing how your name felt on my tongue, that's all.

"I can show you how I feel on your tongue," John said with a wink, the flush on his cheeks betraying his happiness and vague embarrassment.

"Shut up, that was terrible. Just be quiet and keep seducing me," Alexander muttered, moving to straddle him.

"I thought you only wanted to sleep next to me? Not that I'm complaining," John added the last part quickly, arms wrapping around the smaller mans waist.

Alexander rolled his eyes, smacking his arm. "Just shut up and kiss me, loser."

"Can do, jackass."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Hey Aleksander, what are you writing?" "I DONT KNOW"
> 
> Uhhh weird vampire verse with disjointed narrative, take it.
> 
> There's some talk of suicide as well as an attempt, be warned. Also vague non-descriptive porn after the line where John says "Talk to us", if it bothers you at all.
> 
> It's easier for me to write like this? Idk if y'all will necessarily like it but it's kinda fun and it took me less than twenty four hours as opposed to one of my usual crappy pieces which will be worked on on and off for up to a month (or more) lmao.
> 
> Also I did a Spring Awakening esque rendition of The Itsy Bitsy Spider ft. fake drums and that was... the best and worst thing I've ever created.

Alexander was on fire.

Not literally, he didn't think, but it certainly felt as if he were. Though he supposed it was more of an ache than a burn. Quickly he realized he was putting far too much thought into what type of pain he was in and not enough into his actual situation. Slowly, he opened his eyes, was relieved to find that the lighting wherever he was wasn't too bright. It was still enough to make him squint his eyes, half groan.

"He's awake," Said a vaguely panicked and incredibly familiar voice.

"Lafayette?" Alex rasped, trying to sit up. A pair of hands pushed him back down and he realized Laurens was there as well. One look at his face, however, indicated that both of his- whatever they were looked quite upset.

"You were dying we had to I'm so-"

"Quiet Jack!" Lafayette snapped and now Alexander was panicking too.

"What happened?" He demanded, shoving John off and sitting up quickly. It seemed they were in Laurens bedroom, the aforementioned sitting next to him on his bed and Lafayette perched on his dresser. They appeared to have calmed themself and presently looked quite stoic.

"Well, as you know the two of us are vampires and have been as much for quite sometime. And, well, your dumb ass got in a street fight and the other person had a knife. You were bleeding out very quickly and our dearest Jack decided the best choice was to, well, bite you as opposed to seeking medical assistance," They explained in their usual off-puttingly calm yet enthusiastic tone, as if everything they had just said made _perfect_ sense.

"I panicked!" Jack interrupted. "I love you two idiots more than anything else and I wasn't going to lose you! I just wanted to save you, I was gonna ask you to join us in eternity after you'd transitioned fully-"

"I can't transition now, can I?" Alexander asked, voice tiny. Of course he couldn't. He was dead. He was going to be stuck in a body he despised for the rest of, as Laurens had said, eternity. But he was already plotting. He hadn't even wanted to reach the end of a normal human life, and maybe it wasn't fair to what he supposed were his partners but he certainly hadn't asked for an eternity. He would sneak away as soon as he could and it would only make sense that a bullet through the head would effect him the same way now as if he were mortal. Mortal. He still couldn't quite process that bit. That he was no longer mortal.

His words had hung in silence for several beats before Lafayette replied. "No, I'm afraid not."

And suddenly Alexander was nothing short of furious.

"How fucking could you?" He spat, looking straight at John. "You knew. You knew how something like this would effect me but it all has to be about you, doesn't it? Selfish little Laurens can't even wait to see if I'll live before forcing me into a life of being a blood sucking monster!" Jack started to speak, tears in his eyes, but Alex just pointed to the door. "Get the fuck out."

And they did.

-

Her name had been Rose.

She'd smelled like vanilla and coming winter and cinnamon. She'd tasted sharp, metal.

She still stained his fingers, dark as roses he'd seen in a store window not a week before.

-

"You can't crash a funeral, Alexander," Jack snapped, tone harsh, eyes pleading.

"You of all people have no room to tell me what I can and cannot do, Laurens," He replied, turning to Lafayette with a raised eyebrow, wanted to see if they'd try to stop him as well. Practically dared them to.

"Let him go John. You remember how hard it was the first time, no?" They asked, hand on his shoulder. Gentle. Not a word you'd associate with them on first glance, probably.

John nodded, looked like he wanted to say something.

He didn't.

-

Mortals looked beautiful singing funeral songs, he decided. He could practically smell their tears, could feel how grief weighed on their shoulders, on their minds. Could see her teenage daughter and the look in her eyes that indicated she probably would't make it to the end of the year. He wished he could feel real guilt.

He lied, said he was a distant cousin when someone asked how he'd known her. He half wished that was the truth. He wished it was more than half.

-

A week later he learned the barrel of a gun to his temple did not have the desired effect.

-

They were taking a bath when John found out.

He was sitting between the other mans legs, letting him wash his hair. It felt good, familiar. Like things were almost back to normal.

"What's this?" He asked, fingers pressed to Alexander's right temple and the raised scar that lay there. He shrugged in response and could feel the moment the other man realized. He wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him closer and pressing his face into his neck. Alex huffed, squirming.

"It's nothing John," He said, didn't sound convincing. 

"Talk to us," He pleaded, pressed a kiss to his shoulder. Alexander nodded and let himself relax in his boyfriends arms.

-

Sharp teeth scraped across his jugular, broke skin just barely. He groaned, turned to allow more access. There were hands on his thighs, between them. He arched into it, bit Lafayette as they kissed him. They laughed into his mouth, John grinned against his throat. Both of them whispered possessive encouragement into his skin when his thighs started to shake, didn't stop when he cried out.

Things got hazy after that, knew he begged for more than two fingers. Knew he let Lafayette cover him in bruises. Knew he screamed their names until his throat was raw.

After, his lovers held him, whispered 'I love you's for possibly the first time since Jack bit Alexander.

-

Alexander forgave John. He wept into his shoulder the rest of the night.

-

Alexander grinned and wiped blood from Lafayette's chin, looked down at where John was still feeding. Briefly he thought of funeral songs and roses and faces peaceful with death. He pushed the thoughts away.

"Shall we dispose of the body?" Lafayette asked, giving Jack a strange look. Earning no response they sighed and gave a resigned shrug. Brow furrowed Alexander took a closer look and realized his Jack was no longer actually feeding, but had his face buried in their victims neck, shaking just slightly. "He does his sometimes," They whispered.

Alexander knelt down beside him, drawing him up into his arms. They sat together, John in his lap for a few minutes before his eyes refocused and they rose to their feet. An unspoken question hung in the air, one Alex was too afraid to ask and one Jack was unwilling to answer.

They dumped the body in the lake.

-

It was his first birthday since he'd been turned and it seemed John still bore guilt, had spent far more money on him than was necessary. The highest quality binders, a packer, a dozen different books and a new goddamn laptop because his boyfriend was ridiculous. He insisted Lafayette had helped but he could tell from the look on his face he'd payed for all of it. Alexander was quite frankly almost afraid to ask just how wealthy he was, knew he'd probably lose his breath at the number.

"There's something else," Lafayette said suddenly, earning an uncommitted glare from Alexander as they interrupted the movie they were watching. They stuck their tongue out at him and stood up to (presumably) retrieve something, felt John shift anxiously from where he lay in his lap. He cast a grin down at him and carded his fingers through the other mans hair.

Lafayette returned in a moment with a wrapped package and Alexander rolled his eyes as they handed it to him. "Guys- seriously?"

Jack huffed and sat up, crossing his legs and sitting up as straight as he could. "We have a friend, Eliza, and she's- like us. She's also a nurse and we asked her about this and she said it should work and- god just open it," He said quickly and Alexander was starting to get an idea what he was holding.

With shaking hands he tore off the wrapping paper, burst into tears when he saw the testosterone. Laurens pulled him into his lap and Lafayette joined them quickly, grabbing Alexander's hand and pressing a kiss to each of his knuckles.

"I love you both so much. I couldn't be mad at you for one minute for what you did, wouldn't trade more time with you for anything," Alexander said with a hiccup, pressed closer to Jack when he realized he was crying too.

"I love you too," He and Lafayette said near simultaneously, earning a small laugh from each of them.

And for the moment at least it felt as if their pocket of eternity would be nothing short of perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i live off of validation so if you enjoyed maybe drop a comment? Thank you sm for indulging me by simply reading.
> 
> Also crime lord vampires might be fun to write. Would anyone wanna read?


	3. a case of mistaken identity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is short and ugly and i didn't bother edit it lmao. this can be read as jamilton or just unfortunate roommates or whatever i'm not sure what it is
> 
> anyway happy birthday ham! i'm probably gonna publish a lot of stuff today because i can and i have some stuff that's mostly finished.

Lafayette was standing in Alexander's kitchen.

He hadn't seen the man in years, had lost contact shortly after, had missed him so dearly at times it was as if there were a knife in his chest. He'd gone back to France and the last he'd heard had been unjustly arrested. Alexander had been too afraid to find anymore information.

"Holy- what are you doing here?" Alex gasped, an astonished grin spreading across his face. Lafayette turned to him with a very un-Laf-like expression, eyebrows raised, mouth twisted downwards. Something about his face was different, strange, but he hadn't seen the man in so long he had little doubt it could be attributed to age.

"I live here?"

Alexander's heart fell in time with his face. A southern lilt, a near incredulous tone. He remembered Thomas had said he was going to the gym, which explained why his hair was pulled back.

"No shit. I just didn't think you'd be back yet," Alex lied, ignoring the lump in his throat. Ducking his head as not to reveal the tears involuntary welling in his eyes he grabbed his laptop off the counter and turned tail to leave.

"Were you thinking about Lafayette?" Jefferson asked, making Alex freeze. "We were close while I was in France, we got mistaken for twins all the time," He said with a nostalgic little laugh.

Alex turned back slowly, pushing his hair out of his face and looking at Jefferson with tearful eyes. "I miss him," He said, quiet and cautious. He still didn't properly trust Thomas after all this time, felt uncomfortable admitting anything. His style for dealing with any emotion had always been simply not to discuss it, to bury it in vodka and days so long without sleep he collapsed from exhaustion.

"I do to," The taller man replied, gaze flicking away from Alexander's face. They recognized the same grief reflected back in each other, the same guilt at being unable to help someone they'd loved so dearly.

Alex sniffed and wiped his eyes disdainfully with his free hand. "Do you want to talk about it? Or are we going to do what we typically do and pretend this never happened?"

Thomas snorted, the answer being obvious. "The latter," He replied shortly, turning back to finish preparing whatever pretentious snack he'd been in the process of making.

"I have to write anyway."


End file.
